Sunday, October 17, 2010

Born Gay: The Devil Made Me Do It.

"But mama, I was born this way!"  

Damn I wish I had the audacity to tell my parents this when I first attempted to come out to them at the tender age of 11.   But instead, I followed their advice, and believed them when they told me I wasn't born gay, in fact I wasn't even gay, and in fact, there was nothing wrong with me, and if there was, it was the devil tempting me.  Why would the devil tempt me?  Because God allows his best and brightest to be tempted the hardest.   So that's what I got for being a good altar boy: A hard-on for Mario Lopez.

Devil to me: Girl: bad!  AC Slater: Hot!


How does the devil convince your brain to send blood to your penis?   Is it in a whisper, or is it full-on control?   On the flip side, how did the devil manage to tell my brain to withhold blood from my penis every time I would see Pam Anderson do the slow, boob-bouncing jog on Baywatch?   I can picture it now:  Young me, watching TV, bikini clad women oil wrestling, boobs popping out, and the devil himself (who must have been on 24/7 duty on my young adolescent mind) would be like: "OLD NAKED WOMEN, OLD NAKED WOMEN WITH LIVER SPOTS!!!! SUNBATHING EATING COTTAGE CHEESE", but in the tricky subtle way that only the devil could pull-off.    My nature was then repressed by a spiritual force, being that my nature was supposedly heterosexual.  Then here comes a scene from a talk show, where male strippers are invited, and if my sexual nature is heterosexual, the devil must have put heterosexual suggestions in my head in order for me to react accordingly, when the tall latino Adonis ripped his pants off and gyrated his junk in the face of Sally Jesse.  Ok, I just grossed myself out.  

The whole notion of the devil-made-me-do-it in regards to sexuality seems a bit far fetched, because no amount of prayer, fasting, or repression did anything to remove my homosexual feelings, nor did they enhance my heterosexual feelings.    It got to the point where I would force myself to think about and fantasize about women until the idea of being turned on by a woman became somewhat normal to me, however, it was forced, and did not last, at all.



But would you believe, I really believed I was straight, and that, yes… the devil made me do it.   Turns out I've since learned that it's really heterosexuality that is the tool of Satan.  

4 comments:

  1. Hi,

    Please open the link: http://www.orthodoxebooks.org/node/25

    It is a book, titled "Homosexuality and Ordination of Priest Women" by H.H Pope Shenouda the third. May the Lord of Truth enlighten us to the true and righteous path.

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  2. I have read this publication before, and I have to say I find very little redemptive about it. I will probably make a post about it, because I believe it is leading many people astray. The book may describe a certain type of person, but that is regardless of their sexual orientation. This book does not describe the experience of a gay man or lesbian. In fact, the book doesn't even talk about lesbianism. It is obvious it is born out of an islamic culture, which the coptic church has lived within for years. I suggest you take a look at the whole picture. A great article posted in COLT:

    Homosexuality and the Church

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  3. I must start by admitting that the experience of both linked texts was hugely painful.
    So, i'll draft this to both of you guys ("Just A Dude" and the anonymous fella). If you can take just a second to move your brain to a perspective which doesn't experience offense, picture this: If you would have both read all of the Superman comics and would argue this based on that literature, who would win?
    Now...i've got you where i want you. It's irrelevant who wins under the terms your are defining for your debate. Quoting science fiction books does not an argument make. Try thinking at a more basic level. Go through Aristotle, Laplace and surely a bit of Hume. That is where logic and reason starts to surface.

    @Just A Dude: It's your body, your life, your highly complex brain and general chemistry. Embrace the mystery, devote some time to trying to solve the huge puzzle which is "being" if you will, and enjoy it while it lasts. But please, please drop the argumentation based on quotes from bigoted troglodytes. (for harsh language on the subject on bigoted troglodytes, check out Christofer Hitchens.)

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  4. Hi Anonymous #2,

    I'm not really sure where you're going with what you're saying. I have to quote the troglodytes. For most people in the Coptic Church, that is what they are hearing, and only what they're hearing on the subject. My goal isn't to win any debates. I'm merely offering a perspective that is not widely accepted in the community. One thing I can assure you, I'm not where I am today to take a reactionary position against narrow-minded teaching.

    It sounds like you're talking more about the logic behind the arguments presented here, and you ask that I draw from Aristotle and Laplace for inspiration. Maybe you're right.

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